Wednesday, July 15, 2015

I'm So Not Rocking This Holiday

At the beginning of this holiday, I swore to make this holiday fun. Fun, I delivered. Fun, also crushed me. Half way through the holiday I was bone tired with fever and headache by my side. But I've planned all the activities and taking a sick-day leave wasn't an option..... so I dosed myself with paracetamol and carried on with the days. 

The past week was spent in a blur. From the moment I got up, I wanted to go back to bed. All the things that could go wrong went wrong:
  • I was out of breath and felt under-exercised.
  • I got bitten by an unknown species of mosquitos (in winter) and got swollen finger that eventually I had to take medication for.
  • My eyes were burning for days which made me stay away from any screens.
  • Do I have to mention the energyless state?
At the same time,
  • I've got fabric pieces that I had cut out before the holiday still lying on my table, positively collecting dust.
  • M dropped 3 pairs of new pants to hem, two fluffy toys to mend, which are on top of my fabric right now, as a dust cover....
  • My first attempt to knit didn't go too well. After all that time I had invested stitch after stitch, something seemed wrong when I was about to assemble the pieces. The whole process didn't feel very theraputic all of a sudden.

I get overwhelmed quite often when I've got too many things on the go and throttled time for myself. My priority is to be a good mom, and this will never change. But sometimes it's not enough for me. I want more for myself and my own personal growth. Most of the time, these two things conflict. I've seen people with daily cleaners and baby-sitter in the house so they can relax and have a cup of coffee or a manicure. This will never become me, no matter how wealthy we are one day. Plus, I like my plain nails that show a sign of hardwork on healthy meals and get-me-dirty arts and crafts. What is the new motto? Don't get sick. :-D

C has been away today for a playdate. I spent my morning in a dentist's office locating the culprit of my headache. My afternoon was more of a relaxed time spent in the kitchen --- curtsey of load shedding that has made evening cooking unreliable. I've got much needed break and my positivity back. I am recharged (I want to say this with big letters). More holiday fun times? Let's do this.

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